I know she acts all tough and sassy, but underneath it all Batgirl's just as soft and squishy as Doug Mientkiewicz in a pile of puppies. She likes springtime and kittens and moonbeams, and her heart just melts for wide-eyed youths with curly locks and a big swing. And when those youths have really hard years, when they get leprosy and eczema and the black plague and irritable bowel syndrome, well, Batgirl can barely stand it. Case in point: there's one particular wide-eyed, curly-haired, big-swinging youth who Batgirl's really concerned about. He's had a terrible winter and now he's feeling a little anxious about his, well, performance; he just hasn't been able to go all the way if you get my meaning. But on the bright side, this youth--let's call him Justin Morneau--has become a rather potent singles hitter, and today, once again he managed to set the table for another nice crooked number inning for our boys. I mean, he's totally becoming the new Ichiro, except much, much, much slower. Not to mention the 'fro. But I digress. The point is, Justin helped launch the Twins rally in the 4th, not to mention was on the receiving end of some nice double plays out there, and seemed to be overcoming all his difficulties—until he got beaned in the melon. Watching him on the ground like that, white as a sheet, with his curls all out of sorts, Batgirl whispered to him—"Get up, honey bear. Get up. If you get up, you can be the Boyfriend of the Day".

And he got up.

Feel better, good Doctor.

Batgirl/Chairman Mauer 1, Goober/Dr. Morneau 1, Sooz/Stewie 0.