Okay, look, I know all the sentiment is going to go for the kid here; I mean Scott Baker got up there tonight and, well, he pitched his little tail off. But Scott Baker, he's not even old enough to be someone's boyfriend. And being a B.O.D.S.H.C. isn't about making the popular decisions. Sometimes, you have to make the hard choices. And, let's face it, some people's boyfriends have been really, really bad for some time. And, well, those particular boyfriends, we need them to be good. We need them to hit the ball. We need them to, say, get an RBI double and a homer—not in one month, but in one game. And when they do, it's the B.O.D.S.H.C.'s job to say, right-o, old buddy! Cheers to you! Oh, and, Hey, Curly McSlumpypants, for the love of all that's holy KEEP IT UP! And that you, Justin Morneau, are the Boyfriend of the Day.

Field/Readers 16, Sooz/Stewie 10, Jeb/Lewwww 8, Goober/Dr. Morneau 7, Batgirl/Joe 6.