It's like the Twins don't even care about my needs. We could have had Dennys Sampler Reyes on the team. Dennys Sampler Reyes! On my team! Oh, just think of all the fun we could have had together. All the Moon over My Hammy jokes! And--oh--the Grand Slams! Every time he gave up a grand slam we could call it different things, like the All-American Slam, or the Lumberjack Slam, or the Oh, God, My Eyes, My Eyes Grand Slam! Wouldn't that have been fun?

But no. They had to go and cut him. Who do we have in his place, Willie Eyre? See, let me explain something to you--Dennys Reyes is a chunky fellow AND he has a name that looks like that of a tacky artery-busting mega-food chain. That's funny. I can do something with that. Willie Eyre? Name me one funny thing about Willie Eyre. One. Now I can't make any Dennys jokes at all.

And no, Glen Perkins just doesn't cut it.

What happens to a dream deferr'd?
Does it dry up?
like a Raisin in the Sun...?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?