You just knew it was going to happen tonight. You knew it from his first at bat, when Sweetcheeks stepped in and within about three seconds had fouled two balls into the left field foul seats. You thought maybe it would be after he made that great catch in the second then stepped up to the plate right afterwards, but no, we had to wait a little longer. It was worth it. When the ball hit the bat you knew it was gone, and Batgirl, for one, wept. After breaking at the All-Star-Break and looking broken down afterwards, Torii hit his 30th home run in the game where the Twins clinched a playoff appearance, in this most improbable of improbable years. Do I hear 100 RBIs? I know I hear a Boyfriend of the Day.

Readers/The Field 26; Goober/Doctor 25; BatBabii/Torii 16; Sooz/(Cuddy) 12; Batgirl/Chairman 8; Jeb/Lewwww 4.