This entry posted by Twayn, on assignment for Bat-girl.com

Photography is the art of visually capturing a moment, of manipulating light and shadow and time, of containing the ethereal within two static dimensions. Sometimes a photograph can tell a whole story all by itself. Other times it needs some help. Some context. Some sass. And that’s where you come into the picture, Batlings.

To help counter some of the restless, relentless anxiety of waiting – endlessly, endlessly, endlessly waiting for Spring Training and Opening Day – Batgirl has sort of sanctioned an unofficial photo caption contest. Why is it unofficial? Because it’s not really a contest and Batgirl is not available to conduct it. There will be no winners declared. There will be no voting for first, second or third places, or any other places for that matter. And there will be no prizes. Because the knowledge to conduct an actual online photo caption contest with winners and voting and prizes is a closely guarded secret, like nuclear missile launch codes or the formula for Driven cologne, and I don’t have the appropriate security clearance for that.

So what’s in it for you, Batlings? Well, this is a chance to shake off the winter doldrums and stretch those muscles connecting your funny bone to the rest of your body. A chance to take your brain out for a little joyride around town with the windows rolled down, maybe stop and get it a chili-dog and a cherry Coke at the drive-in and let it moon your buddies while you cruise the drag. A chance to entertain and delight fellow Batlings with your scathing wit and overdeveloped sense of jocularity. A chance, even if it is for just a moment, to forget about the cold weather and work and lawsuits (oops, maybe that’s just me) and focus on what’s really important in life – baseball, and making fun of silly stuff.

Since this is an unofficial contest with no winners or voting or prizes, then there must not be any rules, right? Well, hold on there just a minute. We aren’t ready to condone anarchy just yet, not so soon after Disco Demolition Night. So here are the unofficial rules for the unofficial Bat-girl.com 2007 Pre-Season Photo Caption Contest (that isn’t really a contest):

1. Look at the photograph and use the comments area to post your caption.
2. You may post as many captions as you like, but please be considerate of others and give everyone a chance to play, just like in T-ball.
3. No crude profanity, please. If they can’t say it on broadcast TV, you probably shouldn’t say it here. And if they did say it on broadcast TV and got in big trouble for it, ditto.

So that’s it. Look over today’s photo (we'll have more throughout the week) and caption away. And as David Letterman is prone to say in such circumstances, “Folks, this is an exhibition, not a competition. No wagering, please.”