Twins at Seattle. Mariners 10, Twins 9. (11 innings)

Please note: BG started this entry in the middle of the game and, if you watched the game, you understand why it makes no sense at all.

10:58 pm: Okay, it's nearly 11:00 and we're in the 5th inning. Right now the score is 5-4 but BG expects it to be about three times that by the time this damned thing ends at 4 or 5 am. Jeb has just announced his plan for victory: "If we get 6 or 7 hits in an inning and Boof only allows one home run each inning, we might just win." As much as Batgirl is loath to criticize her husband, who is after all her lord and master and she is but his property, she must humbly and respectfully dispute his math because it takes us at least ten hits in an inning to score one run.

I mean, there are so many ways to make outs, really there's a whole world of possibility out there, and it's important to discover each and every one of them, to really invent new and wonderful ways of working out of scoring situations, to explore each and every corner of this unfathomable vastness, this incomprehensible infinity, because it reminds us that the only limits are those of our imagination. Somewhere in Twins Territory there is a child with a problem to solve and that child sees Lew Ford run toward third with Luis Castillo still on it, and he says, "My goodness, there is no problem I cannot overcome, for the universe is limitless and the world is my bitch." And it is beautiful.

And then—

11:25 pm: Oh, goodness. The funny thing about starting these entries when the game isn't over yet is things can change awfully quickly. When BG started, the game was rather close and sometime later Raul "Please Go to the Other League" Ibanez hit a Dennys Sampler Reyes pitch straight to the Moon Over My Hammy, and it was sad because of course the Twins could have had so many more runs if they hadn't been inspiring young children with their exploration of the limitless expanse of possibility, but you win some, you lose many many more--and poor Joe Mauer and Joe Nathan and Jo-Han--but what are you going to do?

And then—

12: 01 am: Well, and then, to begin, Juan Castro doubled with one out in the eighth. Then Luis Castillo walked. Then Lew Fordwalker—who, despite a couple brain farts on the basepaths and losing his shoe on an extremely silly defensive miscue in the eighth, has been having a kick ass game—hits a single and suddenly the bases are loaded with one out. For some teams, having the bases loaded with a five-run deficit means a possibility of getting back into the game, which must be very nice for them. The only reason to keep watching, really, was the fact that Chairman Mauer was up and he is quite clearly the greatest baseball player ever. Well, the Chairman walked. Mike Hargrove seemed upset with his pitcher for it—he clearly didn't realize walking Joe to score just one run was probably the best possible outcome for him. And of course that was the end of it, for if the Chairman can't do it, well then, I mean, look, Torii popped out and now Cuddy's up and it's 1 and 2 and—

Boom!

Now, the thing about this grand slam thing is you score four runs at once. This is extremely awesome, especially when you're behind by four runs. And as fun as finding new and crazy ways to blow scoring opportunities is, BG posits that this is actually even more fun.

1:02 am: Less fun, however, is staying up until 1:02 just to watch Carl Everett rip out Batgirl's heart and hit it to Vancouver. BG never liked him.

BatReminder: Have you Voted Chairman yet? You have? Have you voted 25 times? No? Well, get to it, darn it. Click on the poster to the left and vote your pants off, vote like you've never voted before!